Chasing “Enough” Will Never Set You Free

I said I wanted to create, yet obscured that part of myself.

I said I wanted freedom yet handcuffed myself to a lifestyle.

I said I wanted simplicity but said yes to “nos,” adding complexity to my life.

No wonder life felt “off”.

No wonder I never felt comfortable in my own skin.

No wonder I chased escapes within alcohol and materialism.

My life was the antithesis of what I said I valued. Saying one thing and doing the opposite is the perfect recipe for feeling “off.”

But the messed up thing was I was chasing what I valued through the idea of,

“When I have “enough,” then life will be simple.”

“When I have “enough,” then I’ll be free.”

“When I am free, then I can create.”

I had no idea how much was “enough.” I didn’t have an exact number or even a clue.

I was operating under the guise that I’d hit a certain level of materialistic possessions and money, and the tumblers to freedom, simplicity, and creativity would magically align and unlock the life I wanted.

I was chasing enough, and enough would never be enough because I wasn’t enough.