I Was Waiting For The Perfect Time, I’m Thrilled I Stopped Waiting

Pre-Prison I was waiting for the perfect time.

To start my own business, to be my own boss, to create something meaningful to me.

I never did because I needed that perfect time.

I’d utter,

“If only…”

“I need “X” before I can….”

“Well, that’s not quite right….”

“If only this were happening…”

“I don’t have the right equipment….”

The “perfect” time was a carrot on a stick, and I was chasing it like it existed.

In reality, I was locked in a prison of fear.

I lived in the in-between space of what I dreamed of and reality.

And that in-between space sucks.

It’s limbo.

It’s having one foot in one pool and the other in another pool.

Not committing to jumping fully into one or another — wishing for things to be anything other than they are.

With my feet in different pools, I’d never get anywhere.

Post-Prison I understood something critical: